


Out.

by shiptoomuch



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Beards (Relationships), Bisexuality, Coming Out, F/M, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, coming out against your will
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-10
Updated: 2015-02-10
Packaged: 2018-03-11 07:17:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3318800
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shiptoomuch/pseuds/shiptoomuch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“It’s about your sexuality, Leonard."</p><p>Bones gets outed against his will to homophobic parents.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Out.

**Author's Note:**

> Loosely based on the real life experiences of the author in the past week.

“So you broke up with Jocelyn?” Jim hands the bottle back to Leo and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. “Fucking finally.”

Leo takes a swig of the bourbon he stole from his father’s extensive liquor cabinet and raises an eyebrow inquisitively. “How the fuck did you know?”

Jim laughs and shakes his head. His movements are loose and carefree and Leo cannot keep his eyes off of him. “Dude, you came to my house at nine on a Thursday night, told me to get in the car with no explanation, and now we’re sitting out here getting drunk while you brood.” Jim shakes his head again and grins. “It’s pretty obvious what happened.”

“She cried.” Leo mumbles. “Jesus H Christ, Jim. She _cried.”_

“That poor girl. How could you break her heart like that?”

“Oh, fuck off. You hated her.” Leo shoves at Jim’s shoulder and almost knocks him off of the hood of the red pickup truck. “She wasn’t even that awful, I just wish I could have avoided the whole relationship altogether.”

Jim shrugs and snags the bottle again. “She was sort of a bitch to me.”

“You were a bitch to her.” Leo counters and scoots slightly closer to Jim (to get at the bottle, of course) so that their knees are pressed together. “Seriously, you two hated each other so much, I thought you were going to kill each other.”

Jim is silent for a few confusing moments before he mumbles, “Maybe I was jealous?”

“What?” Leo is sure he did not hear Jim right. There’s just no way Jim could have said that he was jealous of Jocelyn.

“I said,” Jim starts, sounding more confident this time. “Maybe I was jealous. Maybe she had what I wanted and that’s why I hated her.”

Of course, Leo loses his grip on the bottle at this moment and it falls into his lap, effectively spilling a fair amount of the amber liquid onto his black t shirt and faded jeans. “Fuck!” He shouts and jumps off of the hood. “Well, there’s no way I’m gunna be able to hide this from my parents.”

Jim chuckles softly and slides off the hood easily to stand next to Leo in the tall grass. He’s managed to save the bottle and what little is left in there now. He stands too close to Leo. “It’ll be fine, Bones. I doubt they’ll even notice.”

Leo looks up into Jim’s eyes, glowing in the light of the full moon. He smiles softly and breathes in the scent of Jim’s cologne mixed with too much bourbon. “You’re probably right.”

“And even if they do figure it out, I live close enough to come rescue you.”

Leo scoffs and runs a hand through his hair. “What are you going to do? Rescue me like some sort of prince in a shining t shirt and a used car?”

Jim nods eagerly. “We could run away and move to California. Little apartment. You’ll get into some great school and I’ll…I don’t know, sell my body for money to keep us going?”

In what is either the best or worst impulsive decision of his life, Leo tips forward just a bit and kisses Jim. It’s chapped lips and the taste of bourbon and onions from the burgers they demolished an hour ago. It’s not romantic and it’s almost too awkward to really work, but Leo presses on until Jim actually starts responding. Then it’s too fast and too desperate with damp shirts and fingers scrambling for purchase on broad shoulders and narrow hips. 

It’s probably the worst decision a boy from Georgia who’s still in the closet could make, but Leo cannot bring himself to care when he’s got Jim in his arms, making soft noises against his mouth. 

They break finally and Jim starts giggling immediately. He lays his head on Bones’ shoulder, and Leo feels something loosen in his chest. “I’ve been waiting for that so long, Bones. You have no fucking idea.”

“Well, probably a hell of a lot longer than I’ve wanted to do it.” Leo chuckles and responds. “I didn’t tell you why I broke up with Jocelyn, did I?”

-

“Leonard? Is that you?” Leo’s mother calls from the sitting room when he attempts to quietly shut the door and apparently fails. 

He jogs over to the stairs and starts ascending whilst responding with, “Yeah, ma! I was just hanging out with Jim!”

“I thought you were going out with Jocelyn tonight?” His mother yells in response. 

Shit. 

“I was. We were out for a bit…and then I hung out with Jim afterwards. That’s why it’s so late.” He cringes at the words. They’re technically true but they sound more like a lie than anything else. “We were just studying a bit.”

A sigh and “Alright. Well, come down here. I want to talk to you about something.” Sets Leo’s heart racing. 

“Kay, let me just change into some sweats.” Leo shouts from his room and hurries to change as quickly as possible. The smell of the spilled bourbon clings to his skin slightly but it’s not strong enough for anyone to smell unless they’re right next to him. He thanks the lord for small mercies. 

He jogs down the stairs quickly and rounds the corner into the sitting room with a forced grin. “Hey, Ma. What do you need?”

“Why don’t you sit down, Leo?” Eleanora gestures at the old couch with a smile. She’s seated in her armchair with some knitting in her lap. 

Leo swallows thickly and tries to calm the heavy beating of his heart thudding in his chest. “What is it? Did something happen to Dad?” Leo reaches for his cell to see if maybe he missed a call from his father, who’s off at a conference in Chicago for the week. 

Eleanora smiles and waves Jim off with a dismissive hand. “Oh no, your father is just fine. It’s…well, Leonard, you left your laptop on the table tonight and I found some things in the history that were…interesting.”

Leo has to keep himself from jumping out of his chair and running out of the house. His stomach feels like lead as he stares at his mother and goes through all of the things that she could have possibly found on there. His blog, with long analyses of TV shows that could seem like an unhealthy obsession. Conversations with Jim. Maybe she found out that Leo is drinking or-

“It’s about your sexuality, Leonard. I’m worried about you.”

Suddenly, Leo’s ears are filled with a rushing and his vision blurs. The feeling of wanting to run away is replaced by feeling like stone, stuck on the couch with his phone gripped too tightly in his hand. He takes a deep breath to try to get rid of the lightheadedness that is making it impossible to respond. “I want to be with girls.” He says automatically. “I want to marry a girl. I didn’t tell you because that’s what I want. I’m sorry.”

He’s not entirely sure where that response came from, but his mother looks ever so slightly more calm at it. “What is your sexuality, exactly?”

Leo takes a deep breath and scrubs a hand over his face nervously. “I’m…bi, I guess.”

“Do you _really_ want to be in a relationship with a boy? Because I can appreciate a woman’s body but that doesn’t mean I’m gay. Are you sure you are really attracted to them?” Eleanora tilts her head innocently as if her words aren’t cutting into her son like knives.

“I…I do want to be with men, Mom. But I’ve made the decision to be with girls because that’s what you’ve always taught me is right.”

It’s all lies lies lies but he just wants it to go away. He wants this whole thing to be over. He wants to get away from this and go to bed and call Jim and-

“I told your father about it and we’re both just really worried about you, Leo.” She sighs and picks up her knitting once more. “We just have to wonder if it’s something that we did? We fought a lot when you were younger and maybe that…did something to you?”

Leo shakes his head fervently. He puts his hands up as though to protect himself from what she’s saying. “You didn’t…it’s nothing like that, Mom. I’m just…like this. I’ve been attracted men for my whole life, I’m pretty sure.”

“Still, I don’t like it. You know that I love you no matter what but I’d be…disappointed if you chose that lifestyle. I don’t want to lose my son.”

Leo swallows again and squeezes his eyes shut against the tears that are welling up in his eyes and blurring his vision further. “You’re not losing a son, Mom. I’m still me. I’m still the same Leo who does the dishes every night and fixes the sump pump and-“

“How long have you known? How long have you been keeping this from us?”

“I figure it all out when I was a freshman…so about three years.” Leo admits and heaves a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, Ma. I should’ve told y’all sooner.”

Eleanora frowns at her knitting and it makes Leo want to rip it out of her hands because she refuses to look at him. “I don’t want you to tell Anna. I don’t need you affecting her negatively like that.”

It’s a punch to the gut but Leo nods and agrees with her. “I won’t. She doesn’t need this in her life.”

“I’m glad you agree.”

The room feels ice cold and Leo wants this to be over but he cannot stop himself from saying “I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to get kicked out of the house or anything.” It’s too honest, he knows, but he couldn’t stop it.

Eleanora sighs like she was considering it. “Well, from the sound of it, you’ve chosen not to be with Men, is that right?” 

Leo thinks about the way Jim felt pressed against him earlier that night. He thinks about the way their chapped lips brushed together and the taste of stolen bourbon. “That’s right. I want to be with a woman.”

“Then you’re not doing anything wrong and there’s no reason to do anything like that.” Eleanora puts her knitting down finally and looks at Leo. Her eyes are oddly blank. “You know I love you, right?”

“Yeah, Ma, I love you too.” Leo says back automatically. He rises to hug her before going off to bed. She feels sharp and angry when he wraps his arms around her.

-

“My mom _knows.”_ Leo says in place of greeting to Jim.

“ _What?”_

“She _knows,_ Jim.”

“ _About the drinking? Cuz I feel like she already did.”_ Jim pauses for a moment and Leo can practically hear him thinking. “ _Wait did she find out about…you?”_

“Yeah, Jim. She knows about me.” Leo flops backwards onto his bed, phone still pressed up against his face. “She saw conversations on my laptop.”

“ _What did she say?”_

“That she loves me. That she’s worried about me. That I’m not to tell my sister about it. She sounded disappointed.”

“Well, at least you can be real with her now.” Jim says like he’s trying to be positive. 

Leo takes a deep breath to try and rid himself of the guilt. “I told her I only wanted to be with girls, Jim.”

“ _Bones.”_ Jim starts, his voice sounding tight, like he’s upset and trying not to be. “ _Is that what you want?”_

“I thought I made it pretty clear tonight what I want, Jim.” Leo smiles slightly and presses his fingers to his lips as though he can still feel Jim there. “I want _you.”_

Jim laughs like relief. “ _Okay, good. Cuz I want you too, and if you said you only wanted girls…”_

“That would make me an ass of epic proportions.”

“ _You already are one of those.”_ Jim teases, “ _But yeah, that would be distinctly uncool.”_

“It’s not going to be easy to be with me, Jim. We’ll have to really hide it. My parents would kick me out and kill me.”

“ _I know what I’m getting into, Bones. That doesn’t change how I feel.”_

The grin that overtakes Leo’s face is as unstoppable as the thud-thud-thudding of his heart. “You’re amazing.”

“ _And you’re not so bad yourself, Leonard McCoy. Now, go to sleep. It’s late and your night has sorta sucked.”_

“Not completely. I was with you for a while.”

“ _Goodnight, Bones.”_

-

When Leo wakes up after a fairly restless night of sleep, he is filled with a very distinct feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. The night before, he’d been thinking that maybe it wasn’t so bad that his parents now know.

Today, he’s singing a much different song. He’s had all night to ruminate on what his parents will probably do to him, and it is not good. They’ll make him act hyper-straight or get mad at him for acting in a way that may suggest otherwise. They’ll make him cut off contact with certain people. 

He pushes himself upright and groans. He’s too tired to face another day of school but he does not exactly have a choice. No, he’ll just have to go about his day like his world did not get flipped upside down last night.

His phone chimes. Leo grabs for it, eyes still blurry from sleep and grins when he blinks a few times and sees it’s a text from Jim.

_im so hungover but looking forward to seeing you :)_

The butterflies in Leo’s stomach are more like pterodactyls as he remembers exactly what good things happened last night. 

_pick u up soon. dont wanna spend too much time w my mom_

Leo goes about getting dressed quickly in order to get out of this house as soon as possible. He looks in the mirror and scowls at the bags under his eyes. They’re getting worse than usual, he swears. 

The kitchen is an obstacle he was not expecting. Anna is sitting at the counter, eating cereal like every morning. What’s different is Eleanora standing at the counter, too. She usually is not up this early and it stops Leo dead in his tracks. He coughs and tries to recover from the shock quickly. “Mornin’, Anna. Mornin’, Ma.”

“Good morning, Leonard.” Eleanora says with what is so clearly feigned warmth. She eyes the way he grabs for a banana and shoves it in his bag. “You’re not going to sit and have breakfast with us?”

Leo shakes his head and tries to stay casual. “Gotta go pick Jim up. We’re going to study before first hour.”

Eleanora’s pursed lips and slightly narrowed eyes ask the questions she won’t saying out loud for fear of ‘protecting Anna’. “Jim? You two spend an awful lot of time together.”

“He’s my best friend.”

“Still I worry that he might be a bad influence on you.” Eleanora glances quickly at Anna, who’s listening intently, and shakes her head. “Be careful, Leonard.”

Leonard does not respond. He grabs his backpack, waves to Anna (who is fourteen and does not need to be protected from the gays), and walks out. He doesn’t look behind himself, just keeps walking to his truck. It’s not until he’s closed the door that he slumps forward against the steering wheel.

He can practically feel his mother’s eyes out of the kitchen window, so he starts up the truck and pulls out of the long paved driveway going far too fast.

Jim is just about as close to being a neighbor as one can be out in Georgian farm country. (The McCoy’s don’t live on a farm so much as a manor that’s been passed down for generations, but it’s the area they live in.) It’s about five minutes past cotton fields to the old white farmhouse where Jim lives. Leo pulls up and honks twice, already feeling more relaxed that he did when he left the house that morning.

Jim comes tumbling out of the door with a grin as he sprints over to the car. He approaches Leo’s open window and leans in to kiss him soundly. “Hey.” 

Leo smiles and runs a hand through Jim’s hair. “Hey, idiot.”

“Yeah, but I’m _your_ idiot, Bones.” Jim grins and draws out his words. 

“Just get in the car.” 

It’s not until they’re on the road again that Jim reaches over and puts his hand on Leo’s knee. His thumb rubs comforting circles in the denim of his jeans. Leo glances over at him to see a deep frown creating creases between his eyebrows. Leo reaches a finger over to poke at said wrinkles. “What’s wrong?”

“I...just really hate what happened to you last night, Bones.” Jim admits. “You deserve so much better. You deserve to feel safe.”

Leo’s shoulders slump at Jim’s words and he nods. He wants to close his eyes but he keeps them on the road instead. “I don’t know what to do, Jim. I want to be who I am and I want to be with you but I…I can’t do it in that house.” Leo shakes his head and covers Jim’s hand in his own. “I’m so scared, Jim.”

“I’m here, Bones. Whatever you need, I’m here.”

“I want to talk but I have no idea what to say.” Leo breathes out. “I feel upside down and backwards and I just have no idea what I need.”

“We could always ditch school and drive to California.” Jim suggests with a hint of a smile. “Ditch your parents and everyone and just go.”

Leo chokes on a laugh that comes out like a sob. “Yeah, we could always do that.”

“Anything you need, Bones. I’m here.” Jim assures him. “If you need to get out of there, you can come to my place. My mom loves you and she knows about me and doesn’t mind it at all, so you’d be safe.”

“Be careful, I might actually take you up on that offer.” Leo laughs humorlessly. “Once my Pa comes home, all hell might break loose.”

“Do you think he’ll…do something to you?” Jim’s voice is shockingly quiet as he inquires this of Leo. It takes him a moment to remember that Jim’s uncle used to “do things” to his brother and him. 

Leo squeezes Jim’s hand. “I don’t think so, Jim.” He assures his best friend even though he’s not entirely sure, himself. “Even if he tries, I can hold my own against him.”

Jim’s silence says more than Leo wants to hear. It tells stories of thinking he could hold his own against a big bully disguised as a guardian. It radiates concern and love for Leo. It’s every bit of caring that Leo did not get last night.

Leo is overcome by a turn in his gut and he pulls the car over on the open country road. He jumps out of the car and runs around to heave his meager breakfast into the tall grass. A hand on his back tells him that Jim has gotten out of the car, too. 

As soon as he’s done emptying his stomach, Leo’s body is wracked by sobs. He tries to hold it back but the panic and anguish come in waves that he can’t stop. “I’m so scared, Jim.” He confesses between sobs. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know where to go. I feel sick to my stomach but I can’t be at home.”

“Shh, Bones. I’m here. It’ll be alright.” Jim comforts him, still rubbing circles into his back. “It’ll be alright?”

“What if it’s not? Cuz I’m pretty sure it can only get worse from here.”

The words are out in the open now and they bring on a whole new wave of panic rushing over Leo and nearly knocking him down. Jim grasps his shoulder firmly and pulls him over to the car. He shoves him in the passenger seat and brushes a hand through his hair. “I’m driving us back to my mom’s to get you cleaned up. We’ve still got an hour and a half before school, so it’ll be fine.”

Leo nods pathetically and lets Jim buckle him in. He feels like a child but he can’t seem to pull himself together and push the tears back in. 

-

Winona Kirk is all concern and soft words and worried questions as she cleans Leo up and makes sure that he’s truly okay. He assures her that he is (he’s not) and that he can make it through a day of school. (He probably can’t.)

Once they finally reach the school-with Jim driving, of course-they still have half an hour until the first bell and Leo breathes a sigh of relief at that. He’ll have some time to adjust, at least. He can prepare himself mentally. 

What takes him off guard first is Jocelyn leaning up against his locker with a smile. Next is Jim’s whispered. “Don’t worry, I called her.”

“What? Why would you-“

“Leonard.” Jocelyn smiles and pushes herself off of his locker. “Jim told me that you might actually need me.”

Leo grabs onto Jim’s hand and bites his lip. “Well, you’re gunna have to explain this one to me.”

“Your parents found out, according to him, and you need to prove that you want to be with girls. Obviously, we need to act like we didn’t break up. At least in front of them.” She says it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “So I, your amazing ex girlfriend, am here to be your fake girlfriend.”

“What?”

“If your daddy finds you kissing this boy, he might actually kill him.” Jocelyn says plainly and Leo swallows. It’s true.

Jim frowns and folds his arms across his chest. “I could totally handle him.”

“Like hell you could. That man’s got a rifle and scarily good aim to go with it. You need me.”

Leo gapes openly at her. “But you cried. Last night. I broke up with you for Jim and you _cried.”_

Jocelyn sighs and flips her blond hair over her shoulder. “Yes, Leonard, I cried. And thank you so much for bringing that up again when I’m doing something incredibly considerate for you.”

Leo sighs and rolls his shoulders. “Thank you, Joce. I know this sucks for you and you don’t have to do this.”

“It can’t possibly suck as much as it does for you. Honestly, it’s nothing.” Jocelyn places a delicate hand on Leo’s shoulder and smiles at him reassuringly. “You were a good boyfriend, Leonard. It just was never going to work out after this one tumbled in from Iowa and stole your heart. You shouldn’t have to go through this alone.”

Jim snorts and wraps a hand around Leo’s waist possessively. “Thanks, Jocelyn.”

“And you,” Jocelyn turns on him. “You’re a bitch when you’re jealous but I can forgive it as long as you treat him right and don’t abandon him in this.”

“Jocelyn, I could never.” Jim says seriously. “I could never leave Bones like that. He means too much to me.”

For the first time since his mother sat him down, Leonard starts to feel like things might actually be okay.

-

Of course, any amount of comfort that Leo was feeling from his friends during the school day is ruined when he gets home after school with a laughing Jim by his side. He freezes when he’s met with a glaring Eleanora and an equally angry looking David standing just behind her standing in the front entry of their home. “Leonard, school ended an hour and a half ago.”

Leo frowns and steps to block Jim from their twin glares. “We were just studying at the library and I didn’t know that you needed me home right after school.” It’s true, even if he does leave out the stolen kisses behind bookshelves and playing footsy under study tables. 

“I didn’t know Jim was coming over. You should have called.” Eleanora says coolly. She gives Leo that same pointed look that she did earlier in the kitchen. 

“We’re just going to finish our history project.” Leo explains through gritted teeth. “Jocelyn is, uh, coming over for dinner. Is that alright?”

Eleanora and David’s demeanors shift suddenly at the mention of their beloved Jocelyn. “Oh, honey, of course that’s fine! What time will she be over?” Eleanora immediately starts fussing and Leo can practically see her planning a menu.

“Alright.” Leonard nods and presses his lips together in an awkward smile. “Well, I think we’re just going to go up to my room for a bit.”

He’s just about to get away from them but David stops him. “Son, can I talk to you for a minute?” He holds an arm out to direct Leo into his study.

Leo looks behind himself to exchange a slightly panicked look with Jim. The blond smiles at him minutely and claps him on the shoulder. “I’ll just be up in your room, Bones.”

David watches Jim’s retreating form up the stairs with a frown before turning once again to Leo with an extended arm. “Come on, Leonard.”

Leo nods, somehow managing to move himself despite the fact that his body feels like it has been turned to stone. He follows David at an absolutely glacial pace and jumps a bit when he reaches around to close the door behind Leo. “I have to say that I was disappointed when your mother called me about what you’re doing. Can’t say I’m surprised, though.” David crosses the room to sit in his leather desk chair. He strikes an intimidating form sitting there in his suit, surrounded by medical texts that cost more than Leonard’s life, probably. He steeples his fingers together and looks over them at Leo. “I did always wonder about you. Too sensitive.”

“That has nothing to do with anything.” Leo says defensively. Internally, he know that defying him like that will only make things worse for Leo but he cannot bite back the retort. “I’m not sensitive because I’m attracted to men and I’m not attracted to men because I’m sensitive. I just am.”

“Maybe I should have been home more often, worked less hours at the hospital.” David muses, apparently unaware of the fact that his son was speaking, “Should have made sure your mother was raising you right.”

“She did fine.”

“If this is because we fight a lot, I apologize, and I hope you can go back to what you used to be.” David pushes on, still apparently blissfully unaware of what Leo is trying to tell him.

“Shut up!” Leo bursts out finally, unable to rein himself in any longer. “It is not because of anything the two of you did! I’m just like this, okay? Nothing happened to me to make me like boys, I just do!”

David’s head snaps up to really look at Leonard. He stands up and walks over to his son, easily invading his personal space. The older man has narrower shoulders than Leo and is smaller in general but he still seems to fill up the room until Leo can hardly breathe. “You will be quiet about this.”

“It’s who I am.”

“Not while you live in this house, it’s not. You will not bring those…people in here.” David says it like it’s disgusting to him, “And if you and that Kirk boy are doing anything up there, I will find out.”

“Dad, I’m with Jocelyn.”

“I will not have you making a show of yourself for attention and ruining my wife and daughter’s lives.”

“I don’t get why I have to hide this, Dad.” Leo says plainly. He’s less afraid of him that he thought he would be. “It’s a part of me. Just as much as having brown hair is.”

“But having brown hair is not indecent. It isn’t against what’s natural.”

“And it’s something I can change.” Leo fills in the blanks for him. “Isn’t that right, _Dad?”_

David’s responding silence is answer enough for Leonard.

-

“Eleanora only talks to me when you’re around, I swear, Jocelyn.” Leo explains while he looks for his ap bio book. “It’s been a week.” 

“Seriously? But she’s so nice to me!” 

Leo rolls his eyes and slams his locker shut. “That’s because she wants me to marry you so that I don’t end up with a man.”

Jocelyn frowns deeply and snaps her gum a few times (a habit that Leo absolutely loathes), “She was so nice before all of this. Your mom’s turned into such a bitch.”

“Not my mom. Eleanora.” Leo corrects. He stopped calling that woman his mother shortly after the whole ordeal started. A month and a half later, his parents are just Eleanora and David. “Anyways, how are things with you and Clay?”

Jocelyn grins and shrugs bashfully. “It’s good, I guess. He’s finally adjusting to this whole situation and it sorta sucks that way but he’s great.”

Leo frowns. He feels really guilty about what he’s doing to Jocelyn and her relationship with Clay, who she really likes and who Leo thinks is a really good match for her. “You don’t have to do this anymore, Jocelyn. You deserve to put yourself before me.”

“And if I was ever in danger of getting kicked out or killed by my father, I would put myself first.” Jocelyn retorts quickly, “But that’s not the case. Clay gets what I’m doing and why I have to do it and if he didn’t, I wouldn’t be with him.”

“But it’s your life, Joce! I shouldn’t have that much of an impact on it this long after we broke up.” He sighs and puts a hand on the small of her back. “All I’m saying is that you deserve to be happy, Jocelyn. And if this whole arrangement isn’t making you happy, you don’t have to do it. I’ll figure something else out.”

Jocelyn bumps her hip into his and keeps walking ahead of him when he stumbles. “Aw, Lenny does have a heart!” She giggles and runs down the staircase to where Jim is standing in the cafeteria. “Jim, your boyfriend is just the sweetest thing in the whole gol-darned world!” She puts a hand over her heart in a mock swoon.

“Aren’t I just the luckiest boy in the whole world?” Jim effects a mock southern accent and joins Jocelyn in the false swooning over Leo. “He’s a dream, I tell you. An absolute dream!”

“Oh shut up, both of you.” Leo grumbles. “I try to be nice to y’all one god-damned time and this is what I get.” He turns on his heel to walk out to his truck, Jim following or not.

The footsteps behind him in the parking lot are not at all surprising. “Bones! Did we hurt your feelings?” Jim teases. He catches up with Leo at last and wraps an arm around his waist before pressing a kiss to his temple.

Leo hates that he automatically looks around them to make sure that nobody saw. He punches himself internally. “I should have known that the day the two of you became friends would be the end of me.”

“Two super hot blondes being best friends? Come on, Bones, you know us well enough to know that we’d be unstoppable as friends. You really should have been more prepared.”

Leo chuckles and unlocks his car. He throws his backpack in the backseat and raises an eyebrow at Jim, who’s standing there smiling at him. “What’s the matter with you?”

“Nothing. You just look really nice today.”

“Most people would say I don’t like _nice_ any day.” Leo quips but smiles despite himself. He leans forward to peck Jim on the lips and smack his ass. “Come on, get in the car. My parents are out for the night.”

-

They started out actually studying for their Econ exam, Leonard swears. But then studying turned to teasing each other for getting questions wrong and teasing turned to a bit of light wrestling and really that can only lead to one place when it’s two hormonal teenage boys in a relationship. 

So when Leo’s got Jim on his back in his bed, it’s no real surprise. Normally, they would never do stuff like this in the McCoy’s house but his parents are out for the rest of the night, so there’s no chance of being caught by them and getting into even more trouble than he seems to be in already. 

“Shit, Bones.” Jim gasps when they finally break apart for air. His hands rest just above Leonard’s ass, under his shirt with his hands burning prints into Leo’s skin. “How are you so good at that?”

Leo emits a deep chuckle and rolls his hips teasingly, making Jim gasp and buck up. “Call it natural talent.”

Jim moves his hands to wrap his arms around the back of Leo’s neck and pull him back down to kiss him ever more thoroughly than before. Leo gets lost in the feel of Jim’s tongue mapping out his mouth and groans, greedily sucking on his tongue.

It’s just when they’re both getting just past far too worked up that it happens. Leo doesn’t listen for the warning signs and is thus completely unprepared. What he does hear is “Leo? Jim? What the hell?” from the very familiar voice of a certain fourteen year old girl. 

Leo launches himself off of Jim as fast as possible and ends up nearly falling off the bed as he tries to stand. “Anna, I-“

“Are you two…together?” Anna asks, eyes wide. 

Leonard swallows and runs a hand through his hair. “Yeah, Anna. We are.”

Jim, thankfully, remains quiet. 

“Does Mom know?”

“No, and you _cannot_ tell her, Anna. She would kill me.” Leonard begs her, “Please, don’t tell Mom and Dad.”

Anna frowns. Her eyebrows knit together in the forehead. Leo holds his breath and prays to whatever is out there that she’ll make the right choice. 

“It isn’t right, Leo.” She says finally. Leo’s stomach drops to somewhere around his feet. “But I won’t tell them. I’ll let you tell them”

Leo rushes forward and wraps his arms around his little sister, who is stiff as a board in his arms, “Oh thank you, Anna. Thank you so much.”

“It’s not right, Leo.” She repeats once he’s let her go. “You know what they say in church, you know what Mom and Dad have always taught us.”

Leo tries not to let it show how much her words hurt but he hears a sharp intake of breath behind him saying that Jim feels the same way. “I know what they say, but Anna…sometimes Mom and Dad aren’t right.”

“I don’t know, Leo. This is just…a big thing.” Anna frowns but seems to be actually considering what Leo said. “I won’t tell them…but you should.”

With that, she leaves the room, closing the door behind herself. “Shit.” Leo whispers to himself. He turns around to face Jim, who looks pale far beyond his normally fair complexion. “Shit.” He repeats, this time much more loudly. “Jim this is bad.”

“You don’t need to tell me that.” Jim says. “Shit, Bones. Forget about your parents finding out about us. If they find out that Anna knows…we’ll both be done for.”

“Maybe she won’t tell them.” Leonard says mostly to himself. “Maybe she’ll stay quiet.”

“You and I both know the chances of that happening are slim.” Jim says out loud what Leo really was thinking. “Shit, Bones, she sounded just like your parents.”

“I know.”

“She’s only fourteen.” Jim says like a realization. “She’s only fourteen and she’s already thinking like that. That’s terrifying.”

“Yeah, well, she’s never really had to face these things for real. They’ve always just been sort of abstract things that David and Eleanora talk about like they’re poison.” Leo tries to explain how she might feel this way in a way that somehow makes sense but he just can’t do it. She’s so young but already so biased because of what their parents did. “This is the first time she’s had to actually experience anything like this.”

“Still, it’s scary to see.” Jim curls in on himself and tucks his knees up to his chest. “How are we gunna get out of this, Bones?”

“There’s always California.”

-

Besides a few odd looks across bowls of cereal in the morning, Anna does not bring up the Jim Incident. She speaks to him like nothing happened and Leo cannot decide whether or not that’s a good thing. 

It’s two weeks later when she knocks on his door timidly and enters his room with a bundle of papers clutched in her arms. “Hey.” She says quietly. “Can I talk to you about something?”

Leo puts aside his biology book and nods at her. He pats the space on his bed next to him. “Sure. What is it?”

Anna takes her place next to her brother, papers still clutched to her chest. “I’ve been researching some stuff.”

“What kind of stuff?” Leo asks. He reaches out and pulls at the packet of papers. To his surprise, she lets go of it willingly.

What he sees when he flips through the papers makes his eyes water up immediately. It’s a pile of articles about gay rights and whether being queer is a choice. It’s paper upon paper upon paper of research that shows that his sister cares more about him than he ever thought.

“I wanted to know more about it, so I started looking stuff up.” Anna explains. “I didn’t really get it before, but I do now.”

Leonard is too choked up to really say anything in response to that, so he settles for wrapping an arm around her and pressing a kiss to the top of her head. Tears slide down his cheeks silently and drop into her hair. If she notices, she doesn’t say anything.

“I found a lot of stuff.” Anna takes back the papers. “Stuff I’d never even thought about looking for. I always listened to what Mom and Dad said but there’s so much more to it than just black and white.”

“I don’t want you to hate your parents because of me.” Leonard has to say to her. “I know you have a great relationship with them.”

“I don’t hate them. I’m just learning more about the world around me, Leo.” Anna assures him. She pulls an article out of the center of the pile. It’s covered in highlighter and pen marks like she was annotating for a school project. “This is the article that really got me. It’s about a girl whose family didn’t accept her and-“

She is cut off by her own shaky breathing and watery eyes. She sniffles a few times and scrubs furiously at her eyes before taking a deep breath and continuing. “She died, Leo. I…I don’t want that to happen to you. I can’t lose my brother.”

“You’re not going to lose me.” Leo tells her. He wrapped her up in a full hug this time and let her shake and cry against his chest. Even when her tears started to soak through his tee, he did not make a move to get away from it. “I’m not leaving you, kiddo.”

Up until this moment, Leo was not entirely sure of it himself, but right at this moment he knows that walking away from his family is not an option for him. He cannot walk away from Anna. “Thank you, Anna. 

“I love you, Leo.”

-

“Leo, I know you probably don’t want to hear this, but I might actually kill your mother.” Winona Kirk strode through her kitchen, taking off her earrings and tugging at her black pencil skirt. “I swear, it’s bad enough having to dress up for those PTA meetings, but when she stands up there and talks about creating a safe environment for all students and I think about what she’s doing to you-“

“I’m fine, Mrs. Kirk.” Leonard says through a laugh. “I do appreciate the support, though, really.” 

“Where’s Jim?” Winona looks around for her son as though he might be hiding somewhere in the cabinets. 

“Baseball.” Leonard answers. “I’m actually about to go pick him up.” He checks his watch. “Yeah, it’s just about time. If I pick him up late, he’ll be bitching at me about it all night.” He doesn’t bother to gather up his books or anything. He’ll be back here later, after all.

“Did you two actually get married while my back was turned? I mean, I know that you’re both eighteen as of March, but you’re still in high school.” She pauses for a second and quirks her lips to the side with a hand on her hip. “You know, I take it back. If you two got married, I would no longer be the one in charge of making sure he doesn’t get himself killed. Then it would be all you.”

Leo laughs and shakes his head. “That damn fool would end up being both of our responsibilities, Mrs Kirk. He’d find a way to get himself lost in his own home if it weren’t for you or me to help him around.”

Winona grins and nods cheerfully. “But we still put up with him. Why is that?”

“He says it’s because we love him, but he can’t be trusted, you know.” 

Winona’s cackling (which sounds a scary amount like her son’s) follows him out the door and Leo cannot help it if he feels a bit more chipper than usual on his drive over to the school.

“Bones! You look actually happy!” Jim chirps as he hops into the truck and kisses him hello. “What’s got you in a good mood?”

Leo shakes his head and puts his hand on Jim’s thigh. “Just feeling good, darlin’.”

Jim’s grin glows bright in the darkness of the night. “Darlin’.” He repeats. “I like that.”

Leo leans over and kisses Jim’s temple. “I know you do.” His cheek. “Darlin’.” He captures Jim’s lips with his own. “I love you, Jim.”

It’s the first time he’s actually said it out loud. They’ve spent nights together (few and far between) and stolen touches and soft words throughout the course of their relationship and Leo is pretty sure they both already knew but this feels so right to him that he can’t help but tell Jim. He wants to say it until he runs out of breath. “I love you so much.”

Jim smiles and brackets Leo’s face with his hands. “I love you too. I love you more than I’ve ever loved anything, Leonard McCoy.”

The rest of their night is spent with small smiles and soft touches in cars and on porches and in Jim’s room. When Leo has to leave to go home, they stand on the porch until Winona turns out the light and yells at them to get off her porch and get a room.

Leo goes home happy.

-

The first thing Leo is met with when he walks in the door whistling some unknowable country tune is his mother’s nails digging sharply into his bicep. She drags him into the living room before he can even think to protest. “I saw you.” Eleanora hisses at him. “I saw you and that _boy_ in your car tonight.” 

Leo tries to take a step away from her but her hand is still holding tightly to his arm with a surprising amount of strength. His eyes goes wide and he scrambles to find an excuse, some explanation that could get rid of the dangerous glint in her eyes. “Ma, I-“

“I knew the two of you were doing something like this, I just thought you would have the decency to keep it in private.” She cuts him off sharply. “It’s disgusting children could have seen you.”

“Mom, please,” Leonard starts off, already begging, “Please don’t get mad. Please don’t kick me out. I-“

“Love him?” Eleanora says derisively. “The two of you aren’t capable of feeling _real love_. All this is is some teenage rebellion and sexual desire.”

Leo wants to yell at her. He wants to shout and scream and break things to prove that he does love Jim and will love Jim for a long time to come but he doesn’t. Instead, he stands there with his eyes cast down for fear of seeing more of that anger in her eyes that look so much like his own. Anger for something that he can’t help but feel for someone as amazing as Jim Kirk. 

“Now, I know that you are worried about getting kicked out of my house and believe you me, if it was your father handling this, you’d already be out on the streets so fast your head would spin. But I won’t let that happen to you. Instead, you’re just going to live by a few rules of mine.” She smiles like what she is doing is benevolent and just. 

“Ma, please-“

“No. You are my son living in my house and that means that you are going to do as I say. That means turning in your cell phone every night at six. That means only driving to school-when school starts and not an hour before-and home from school exactly when the day is over. That means that you are not to use your laptop without supervision. That means that you are to cease your…relations with the Kirk boy.”

“His name is Jim.” Leo says. “He’s not ‘the Kirk boy’ and he’s not ‘one of that sort’. His name is Jim Kirk.”

“I suppose it doesn’t matter, seeing how you will not be seeing him again.” Eleanora raises a challenging eyebrow, as though daring him to try and fight it. “You promised me, Leonard. You promised that you would deny those unnatural feelings of yours.”

“They’re not unnatural.”

“Oh, I know I raised you better than to actually believe that.” She releases his arm finally. Leo rubs at the spot where there are sure to be red marks. “Now, does Jocelyn know about all this? Or have you just been stringing her along to cover up your actions?”

“She knows.” Leonard admits. “She knows and she still thinks highly of me. We actuall broke up a little over two months ago. The night you found out about…me.”

“Well of course you got that sweet girl all mixed up in your business. I feel so sorry for her parents.” Eleanora shakes her head ruefully. “You can go to bed now. Leave your phone on the kitchen table.”

Leo does not want to do as she says but he knows that fighting her will only lead to something worse than what he’s already been dealt. He’ll get taken out of school or worse, he’ll have David sicced on him. 

He trudges up the stairs to his room, shuts the door behind himself, and goes about changing into a pair of sweats to sleep in. He sighs and looks at the clock. Eleven thirty sharp. It’s late but tomorrow is a Saturday and he won’t have to get up early for anything.

He and Jim were planning on going to the aquarium together but Leo knows that is definitely not happening now.

He’s fifteen minutes into formulating ways to communicate with Jim (carrier pigeon seems to be his best option right now) when a tap on his window makes him jump. He whirls around to find Jim’s face pressed up against the glass. Leo barks out a laugh and rushes over to the window.

Just like Jim said he would two months ago, he’s climbed the big tree outside of Leo’s window like a knight in a shining tee shirt. He climbs in the window with a deftness that Leo would not have thought possible. “Hey, Bones. I had to see you and you weren’t answering your phone.”

“So you climbed the tree outside my window?” Leo asks incredulously.

“Yeah. I had to see you.” Jim grins and leans in for a kiss.

Leo stops him with a hand on the middle of his chest. Jim’s face falls and Leo’s heart breaks. “Jim, we can’t do this anymore. My mom knows and she’s mad. Real mad.”

Jim’s face goes from heartbroken to angry to worried in a matter of seconds. “What did she do to you? What’s going to happen to you? Are you alright? Are you hurt?” Jim asks question after question, all the while looking Leo over for some sign of something being really wrong with him. 

“I’m fine, Jim. She’s just making it so that I can’t talk to you or see you anymore. I can only go to school and that’s it.” He breathes out the words softly so that his mother has no chance of hearing them. He covers Jim’s hand resting on his cheek with his own. “I’ll be fine.”

“Bones, that’s not okay. Not even a little bit.” Jim says seriously. “She can’t do this to you.”

“We graduate in three weeks. I can leave then.” Bones attempts some small bit of comfort. “Then we’re off to Berkeley together and it’s a whole new start.”

Jim is off in another world, though, and not listening. “She can’t do this to you.” He mumbles. He snaps back to reality quickly, though, and moves toward the window. He’s already halfway out of it when he thinks to say. “I just need to go talk to my mom about…something. I’ll see you soon.”

Leo stands in place, utterly confounded by Jim’s antics. “I’ll see you. I love you.”

“Love you too, Bones.” And he’s out of the window and into the night.

-

Someone pounding rather loudly on their front door is the first thing that Leonard registers in the morning. He, of course, makes no move to answer it and instead rolls over and tries to go back to sleep.

“Eleanora McCoy, if you don’t open this door right this damn minute, I will break it down!”

Suddenly Leonard is much more awake. Winona’s angry yelling is unmistakable, even through the thick oak door. He falls out of bed and stumbles to put on some pants and get down there before his mother can. 

He is, of course, too late. Eleanora is already opening the door with a scowl. “What the hell do you think you’re doing on my property, Winona?”

“I’m here for Leonard.” Winona says, pushing her way into the house. She spots Leonard standing on the upper landing immediately and waves brightly. “Hello, Leonard. Pack your things, you’re getting out of here right now.”

“What?” Is Leonard’s oh so eloquent response.

“Yes, what are you doing?” Eleanora chimes in. “You of all people are not taking my son anywhere. Not with that awful son of yours.”

“That awful son of mine told me how you’re treating Leonard and I will not stand for it!” Winona barks back. She steps closer to Eleanora. She easily towers over the woman and uses that to her advantage. “I stood by while you made him feel like garbage for being who he was because at least he could turn to Jim for comfort but I draw the line at taking away his contact with the world.”

“I’m his mother. It’s my right.”

“You are no mother to him if you think that’s right.” Winona nearly spits in his face and Leo can only watch on in shock. 

Eleanora’s eyes meet his dangerously and he takes that as a cue to run back into his room. He hardly knows what he’s doing when he starts actually packing a bag. He’s got most of his wardrobe stuffed inside two suitcases before he realizes it and sits down on his bed. 

The yelling is continuing outside his room but the words are hardly intelligible through his door. He makes himself keep packing if only for something to do. 

Footsteps up the stairs and outside of his room. He braces himself for the wrath of his mother. What he gets instead is Winona Kirk smiling at him softly. “Come on, Leonard. I’m getting you out of here.”

She kneels down on the floor in front of him and puts a hand on his knee. Leonard can’t help but wonder if this is a very vivid dream. “Really?”

“Really. Let’s go.”

If Leonard cries on the way to the Kirk home from sheer relief, no one says anything about it.

-

Leonard is surprised to see his family at graduation. It’s the first time he’s seen his parents in three weeks. (He’s been video chatting and calling Anna on the phone that Winona got for him every night.) They smile at him and his mother hugs him stiffly. Leonard promises to talk to them later.

His father seems sad.

The whole thing is a blur of speakers he barely knows, old people he has never seen, and caps thrown in the air by whooping teenagers. He stands next to Jim and holds his hand the whole time. Jocelyn gives them a thumbs up and tries to say something but her boyfriend (her real boyfriend) swoops in and kisses her senseless.

A month passes. It’s a month of days sitting together in the sunshine (Jim covered in sunblock, of course) and being together at last. 

It’s a month in which Leo finally talks to his parents. His mother cries. His father shakes his hand and tells him that they will still be paying for his school. Leonard hugs them both and tells them that he’s still upset with them but he’ll work on it. Honesty seems to be the order of the day, at least.

The month is over and July brings boxes loaded into a rented van while Winona cries. “Don’t cry, Mom.” Jim says with a longsuffering attitude. “We’ll be back for Christmas.”

She cries anyway. She cries no less than once a day the week before they leave. She cries when she hugs them goodbye and waves with Anna as they drive away.

They’re on the highway and on their way toward a new start when Leo reaches across the center console. “Are you ready for this?” He asks.

Jim grins at him and adjusts his sunglasses. “Are you kidding me, Bones? It’s California at last. Of course I’m ready.”

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback totally appreciated  
> Tumblr: fabtrek


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